Chapter 10 / The Little Giant

CHAPTER 10

The Little Giant

It’s about 8:15 in the morning and Jackie and I have been chatting with Stacy for a few minutes as Richard slowly approaches.  Kahana is on line in Starbucks getting his coffee and Stacy’s. Stacy and Kahana are now living together. Kahana and Stacy were spending so much time together; there was no need for Kahana to maintain an apartment.  Since they started living together, Stacy does not wait on line for coffee at Starbucks. That is Kahana’s role in the morning.  Kahana generally arrives about two to five minutes before Stacy each morning as his car is in the driveway of the townhouse and Stacy’s Porsche is parked in the garage.   Kahana gets to Starbucks, hands me the newspaper and then goes to wait on line for their coffee. When Stacy arrives, the coffee is there waiting.  Timing does not always work as Bobby the barista has the line backed up often.

Richard approaches cigarette in hand as usual.   He is dressed in golf attire.   He has a golf shirt, a sweater vest, his chinos and loafers.  In typical fashion Richard sneaks up behind Jackie and gives her a kiss on neck. It is a kiss that he does not give to any other of our group, except Tammy.  And, we have not seen Tammy for some time now.

After he finishes his kiss Richard puts his hands on Jackie’s shoulders and gives his patented 30 second massage.  This short, middle aged man with grey hair and a cuddly appearance needs to lift his arms high to massage Jackie’s shoulders as she sits.  His hands and fingers are bigger and fatter than his size would suggest.  At barely 5’5, he is a good three or four inches shorter than Jackie.  Jackie closes her eyes for a brief moment as she enjoys the massage treatment.  

Richard then steps back and stands there for a moment to hear the topic of conversation or to draw additional attention to himself.   Jackie asks Richard if he is playing golf today.  “No, but I might hit some balls later”. He says.  Richard is an avid golfer among other things.

Richard makes his own hours at the brokerage firm as he is senior and manages a small book of business for private clients.  If he does not have a meeting or a conference call about some new stock issue coming to the firm, he is usually just watching the market to protect his client’s investments. Richard never loses money for his clients. At least that is what we are told. Whether the market is up or down, Richard knows how to create a return on the investment.  Richard is an expert on most businesses.  He looks forward to the time when he will be invited to be a guest speaker at a conference to share his vast knowledge and experience.

We do invite Richard to come to many of our evening get togethers with Terrie, his girlfriend. Most times he declines or says he will get back to us, and never does.  He stops by Rocco's on occassion but never on a Wednesday night.

Richard asks “does anyone want anything inside?”  “Kahana is already on line” Stacy responds.

Richard holds the door for an attractive blonde woman in business attire, and walks in behind her.  Richard has several people in front of him on line. He proceeds to strike up a conversation with the attractive woman.   The woman is about two or three inches taller than Richard and probably ten or fifteen years younger.   The casual banter between Richard and the blonde continues even after they purchase their coffee and are at the condiments counter to get cream and sugar.

When Richard returns, I ask “did you get a telephone number or a date?”  Richard responds, “no, she works in my building. I had asked her out before and was turned down”.   Richard adds that “she has some serious issues.  Why else would she turn me down?”

Richard is still dating Terrie and is very close with Terrie’s children as well.  Nevertheless, he has his wandering eyes and is a flirt.  Richard has a very healthy self-esteem. He has no problem going approaching any woman and striking up a conversation.  No one is out of Richard’s league.  While most turn him down or decline an invitation for a date.

Richard is selective. He will not date someone if he knows the guy the woman dated had before.  It’s the “sloppy seconds” syndrome.  His self-esteem is so high that he can’t take a second position to anyone that he knows.  Although, he admitted that “if she is extremely hot, then I might complain a lot but I’d do her”.

Richard sits next to Jackie with his coffee.  His attention directed towards her alone.  Stacy and I and Kahana don’t really matter now.  Richard is back to his morning flirt with Jackie.  At first Jackie found him extremely obnoxious. But after a few months, Richard turned Jackie. Now she views him as charming.  Each time they sit together, Richard finds the excuse to touch Jackie. Whether it’s the good morning kiss hello, the quick shoulder massage, the good-bye kiss, the rub of the back, or the squeeze of the knee that makes Jackie giggle; Richard is touchy-feely and   they have become close.

Richard does not kiss or touch Stacy. He did not kiss or touch Stacy before Kahana and certainly not since his arrival.   He gives other women a kiss hello, like Talia or Tammy. But only Jackie and Tammy get the full treatment. 

Richard had a bitter divorce.  He would tell Jackie “life’s a bitch and then you marry one”.   According to Richard, his ex-wife is evil. And, she is the perfect fit for the acronym C U N T: “Can't Understand Normal Thinking”. Richard believes that acronym pertains to most women.

“Richard, you are so cynical”, Jackie would say.  And he would take that as the opportunity to squeeze Jackie’s knee and smile saying, “I am just speaking the facts”. 

Richard told us of his experience with a woman at the local department of motor vehicles.  His driver’s license was up for renewal, and had the wrong birthday on it.  It was off by exactly ten years. He went to the clerk with his US passport as identification to show the true birth date. The woman at the DMV would not hear of it. She demanded an actual birth certificate before she would change the date.  While the woman was following office protocol, to Richard she was simply a “cunt”.

Richard has hockey tickets, and offers them the Jackie; “Do you want to see the Panthers play your Canadians in two weeks?” he asks.  “Sure, Alfred would love to go”.  Jackie responds.  Richard knows that Jackie and Alfred are Canadian and hockey fans. Well, that is redundant. Canadian and hockey fan really go hand and hand.   “My seats are the best in the house”, he boasts.  “Center ice and about twelve rows back”. He adds.    Offering the tickets, Richard endeared himself to Jackie even more, enough to warrant the continued touchy-feely.

I get along with Richard, although I find him obnoxious, self-centered and egotistical.   He always can out do you.  Whether it’s cooking or grilling at home, in business, in his knowledge of sports, his coaching techniques, his purported history in playing sports, his various careers; Richard has been there and done that as good as or better than you could ever have done.  Except that Richard’s sons can do things almost as good as he could.

If you sit with someone long enough those traits that you find so annoying can become tolerable and humorous. In Richard’s case, I can poke fun at both his age and his propensity to boast of his experiences.  For example, I encouraged Richard to see the movie the King’s Speech (a recent movie that took place during the rise of the Third Reich and start of WWII, because as I told him “Richard you should see the movie, you were probably there listening to the King speak”.

After about 30 minutes Richard finishes a cigarette and stands to leave.  He grabs the sport’s section of the newspaper, folds it in half and like a guy about to head to the toilet says his good-byes and leaves.